It was Clark. He was alive!

“Clark,” she repeated, her heart leaping in pure joy. She rushed to undo the locks and bolts on the door, fumbling in her haste, until finally she was able to wrench the door open.

“Clark!” she shouted, half-sobbing, as she stood facing him. A huge smile creased over his scruffy features, and he immediately reached out to enfold her in his arms. Lois went, too stunned to do anything but register the fact that Clark was alive after all and that he’d come home to her.

She’d been given another chance. And this time she wouldn’t waste it.

<<OOH, great line! Hints at so much possible for the future. I wonder whether Lois will remember that once she finds out the truth. *grin* At least this time you can’t angst us over the fact that Clark let Lois think he died. He told her as soon as he could.>>

********

Clark had been a little tempted to believe that his parents might have exaggerated about Lois’s reaction to his supposed death - but as soon as she opened the door and cried out his name, he knew that, if anything, they’d underestimated her feelings.

The Lois who stood in front of him looked gaunt, with dark rings under her eyes. He barely recognised her as the well-dressed, stylish professional woman he’d worked with for the past six months; she wore a baggy sweater with a pair of disreputable sweatpants, and her hair looked as if it needed washing. She gave the appearance of a woman who simply didn’t care what she looked like, and who hadn’t slept for several days.

His heart turned over, thinking of the pain she’d clearly been through. And he opened his arms wide to hug her.

She ran to him, emitting a little sob as she did so, making his heart twist again. It was believing that he was dead which had distressed her so badly. *He* had caused her pain... but at the same time, he was discovering, to his great surprise, just how much Lois cared about him.

They needed to talk... but not in the hall outside her apartment. Breaking the hug, he wrapped his arm warmly around her and led her back inside. Lois went, silently sliding her own arm around his waist and leaning her head against his shoulder, as if unwilling to let him go.

“Clark? It’s really you?” Lois asked once they were inside, her tone suggesting that she was still finding his reappearance hard to believe. To his amazement and dismay, tears were shimmering against her eyelashes.

“Yeah, it’s me all right,” he assured her, hating that his absence had upset her so much - and yet delighted that he clearly mattered so much to her. “Lois, I’m so sorry - I had no idea that you thought... I’d never have left you believing...”

“Clark,” she interrupted him, sliding out from under his arm and standing directly in front of him. Ignoring the dirt and dust on his clothes, her hands slid up his chest, investigating the solidity of his body as if she’d feared that he might be a ghost. He stood perfectly still, somehow knowing that this wasn’t the time to launch into his carefully-prepared explanation of where he’d been for the past three days.

<<You got that right, buddy! J >>

And then her hands moved up to caress his face, moving over his jaw and across the rough, stubbly planes of his face, and his breath caught.

He and Lois frequently touched each other, these days; simple gestures, such as him putting his hand lightly against her back as they exited a room, or her laying a hand on his chest to emphasise a point in discussion. If one of them stood reading the other’s computer screen over their partner’s shoulder, they’d lay a hand on the seated one’s shoulder.

This was different. Those other gestures were casual, an everyday contact between friends who worked together and who were both pretty tactile people. This was very different. This was... intimate. Her fingers traced his face as if she was committing it to memory, needing physical as well as visual proof of his continued existence.

Then she moved to stand on tip-toe; Clark’s arms shot out to support her as she wavered for a moment. He wasn’t sure what she was trying to do, but the intent look on her face told him that he was probably better off not interrupting. Gripping her gently but firmly at her waist, he stood motionless, waiting for her next move. Touching his hair, perhaps?

Her fingers delicately traced the outline of his lips. Her dark gaze watched the movements, apparently fascinated. And then she leaned towards him and, as he held his breath, her lips met his in a feather-light whisper of a kiss.

Taken aback, at first he wasn’t capable of a response; then, as she faltered, unsure, his hands slid upwards, unable to resist her. One cupped her chin, and he took over, sliding his lips over hers warmly, affectionately... lovingly.

“Lois...” he whispered against her mouth, unsure whether it was a protest or a plea. She shook her head slightly, sliding her arms around his neck to pull him closer to her. Her mouth sought his again, this time kissing him as if she was desperate... as if afraid that he was going to vanish from her arms at the stroke of midnight, he suddenly realised.

And he was loving every second of it... her lips tasted sweet and so essentially Lois. He badly wanted to sweep her off her feet and carry her to the sofa... no, those couches were instruments of torture. The kitchen counter? The bedroom? Anywhere they could continue kissing in comfort and uninterrupted...

But much as he was loving kissing her, *really* kissing her without any deception in the embrace, he knew that he was going to have to make her talk to him. She might be kissing him now, behaving as if she was never going to let him go ever again, but once she came to her senses she’d be embarrassed at what she’d done. After all, she wasn’t in love with him. She wasn’t even attracted to him.

She’d just... been devastated because she thought he was dead.

He tore his mouth away from hers, holding her away from him. “Lois, we need to talk. I need to... explain...”

“No! Clark... please... don’t go,” she pleaded softly. “I couldn't bear to lose you again...”

“Hey, I’m not going anywhere,” he assured her instantly, his gaze not moving from her beloved face. It pained him to see her so distressed, and it hurt him even more to know that he was the cause of it. “I just think we should talk. And... well, I’m pretty scruffy, and stubbly...” He raised a hand to caress her cheek gently, noting with regret the red rash which was developing on her smooth skin. “Come on. Sit down and we’ll talk.”

What was he doing? For the first time since he’d known her - well, apart from the time when she was under the influence of the pheromone - Lois wanted, freely and without any pretence, to kiss him. And he was stopping her? But he knew that it was the right thing to do. She needed - deserved - an explanation, and anyway, he was well aware that she’d regret the kisses they’d shared once she’d recovered from her shock at seeing him again. She only loved him like a brother, after all.

<<Wow, Wendy missed a chance to have them end up in bed and all that would follow that? *grin* Just kidding. Actually I’m really glad that he did stop. Lois may be not quite in her right mind now, but Clark is, and it’s right for him to realize that it would be taking advantage. Plus I’m desperate to see what he’ll tell her, even more than for smoochies! Wow, that’s a first. J >>

Though he knew that he would never forget how her kisses had tasted, what those moments in her arms, hearing her soft whimpers and feeling her holding him so close to her, had felt like.

She allowed him to lead her to the sofa; he’d barely sat beside her when she grabbed his hand and held it captive in both of hers. “So talk, Clark,” she said roughly, her voice husky from, he thought, crying. “Where’ve you been for the past three days? And why did you let me think you were dead?”

<<Whoa. Interesting phrasing there. Quite confrontational for someone who was making out with him a minute ago. J Can’t wait to see how he’ll respond.>>

********

Lois held onto Clark’s hand, needing the tangible connection with him as reassurance that she wasn’t imagining his presence in her apartment. He really was here, she told herself. He really was alive; alive and well, though looking pretty much the worse for wear. Not that that mattered; the important thing was that he was *alive*!

He was very much alive, too, if his response to the kisses she’d plastered all over his face was anything to go by. She ducked her head as a wave of embarrassment flooded over her: how could she have done that? She’d just... just grabbed him and made him kiss her! Her *friend*! It wasn’t even as if they’d ever kissed before - well, other than for ruses or things like that.

<<LOL. Fun second-thoughts Lois has got going here.>>

But she’d seen him, spoken to him, heard him speak to her... and she’d known that she hadn’t been building bittersweet fantasies in the aftermath of his loss. She *was* in love with Clark Kent. And suddenly it had seemed like the most important thing in the world to kiss him, to feel him kissing her back - a tangible proof that he was alive. Living, breathing, in her arms. No, it had never been a habit between them, and yet to her, just then, nothing had ever seemed so natural.

<<Oh, wow. *happy sigh* That’s beautiful, Wendy. Now if she’ll only keep that in mind while he explains…>>

And... he hadn’t seemed to object. And if she’d meant her resolve not to let this second chance she’d suddenly been given slip away, then it had to have been the right thing to do, even though she hadn’t even been thinking in those terms when she kissed him. It had been sheer impulse, a conviction somehow that it was the right thing to do, a driving need from somewhere within her to feel his lips against hers, to let his kisses drive out the nightmare of the last three days.

Kissing him also meant, she supposed, at least meant that he couldn't help but know that she was interested, and maybe she could find out if she had a chance with him. Their frantic kisses - well, her frantic kisses, to which he’d responded with enthusiasm - seemed to suggest that they were pretty compatible, at least in that respect. Clark Kent was a darned good kisser! In fact, if he hadn’t made her sit down, she might well have fallen down anyway.

All the same... where *had* he been for three days? Considering the state of him, it looked as if her fanciful imagination of him wandering around in Suicide Slum with amnesia wasn’t such a crazy idea after all. She’d never seen her partner looking quite so disreputable, even after that time when he *had* actually been found in Suicide Slum without his memory.

Although, in a way, it almost didn’t matter where he’d been, and once again she was seized with the desire to tell him that she didn’t care. The important thing was that he was here with her. That she had another chance.

Another chance at having, and keeping, the best friend she’d ever had.

Another chance to be honest with Clark about her feelings and to tell him that she loved him.

If she dared... if she thought that he could love her back...

<<Wow again. This is really fantastic introspection, I love it! If only he has a good explanation, or tells her the truth. If only!>>

Now that he was here, sitting beside her and holding her hands with his, she suddenly began to question the likelihood of her yearnings turning to reality. After all, she was the kiss of death to relationships, wasn’t she? And anyway, why would she even imagine that Clark could love her? After all, he hadn’t been affected by the pheromone the other week, and he’d told her afterwards that it had to mean that he wasn’t attracted to her.

<<Should have known that would come back to haunt her. L>>

<He is so attracted to me!> <<LOL!!!>> she protested silently, reminding herself of the way he’d looked at her in their first week of working together. And the way he’d looked when she’d told him that they were partners, nothing more, and that she loved him like a brother. There had to be a chance for them! And besides, the way he’d kissed her back just now *had* to mean that he felt something for her. She’d bet anything that he wouldn’t kiss his sister - if he had one - like that.

<<Eww eww. I hope not. I volunteer to be his sister to find out. J Sisters see brothers naked, right?>>

“Lois?” Clark’s voice cut across her thoughts. “You okay there? You look as if you’re miles away.”

“Uh...” She shook herself mentally. “No... No, I’m fine. Still a bit shocked, I guess. I mean, I’d just about accepted that you were dead, and then you turn up on my doorstep...” She felt tears threatening again at the memory of her pain at his presumed death, and blinked them away. Everything was all right. He was alive.

“I guess it was a bit of a shock,” he said, sounding apologetic. “I... uh, well, there wasn’t really any other way to do it. I mean, I’m not sure how you’d have reacted if I’d just called you...”

“No! No, I’m glad you came over,” she said quickly. “*Really* glad, Clark.”

“Me too,” he said softly, squeezing her hands and giving her a smile which made her heart turn over. “Anyway...” he continued slowly, blinking a little. “I need to tell you what happened, don’t I?”

“Would be nice,” she teased.

He didn’t respond immediately, instead simply looking at her, his gaze meeting hers as if searching for something in her expression... or seeing something there and wondering what to do about it. She got the impression that he was considering something very carefully, but she had no idea what.

Then he smiled, the warm, affectionate smile which she loved seeing on Clark’s face. “Yeah. It would.” Then he ran his free hand through his hair and said, in a different voice, “Well, did you know that there was an earthquake in Indonesia?”

Lois nodded, puzzled at the apparent non-sequitur. “Yeah. I saw it on the news the other night. Superman was there.”

Clark nodded in return. “Okay. The official explanation is that... well, Superman came by late that night on his way to Indonesia, and he offered to take me out there on the understanding that I’d write about it, to persuade Western governments and people to send more aid. I... I guess I should have left a message for Perry, but it all happened so quickly...”

*Superman* had taken Clark to Indonesia? Lois took a sharp intake of breath as she understood just how fortunate Clark had been. She’d give her eye teeth for Superman to offer her an opportunity like that. It was incredible...

But... wait a minute...

He’d said that was ‘the official explanation’. So...

Her gaze searched his face. He was looking steadily back at her, meeting her eyes, an expectant expression on his face. It was obvious that there was more to what he’d said.

“The *official* explanation...? So... what’s the real explanation?” she demanded.

Clark released her hand and got to his feet abruptly and took a deep breath. “I guess the easiest thing to do is to show you.”

<<Whoo-hoo! Good explanation for the public, excellent! And as for showing her…>>

********

Standing facing Lois, Clark hesitated. Was he really going to...? Here? Now?

But it was the right thing to do. He’d been sure of it when he’d taken that split-second decision to make it clear to Lois that the explanation he’d decided on back in Smallville was for public consumption only. He owed her the truth, if for no other reason than that he’d put her through the hell of believing that her best friend was dead. Even if he hadn’t done it deliberately, even if he’d had no way of knowing what had happened and that everyone believed him dead, it made no difference. The effect had been the same.

And so Lois would learn the truth. He had no qualms about it now, anyway. The Lois Lane who’d become both his partner and his best friend wouldn’t run with the news straight to the Planet; he knew that she’d keep his secret. And the thought of her being in on the secret was suddenly exciting, as well as nerve-wracking. How would she react? Would she be angry? Would she lose interest in Superman, once she knew that he was just an ordinary guy called Clark Kent? Or would she suddenly decide that she liked Clark a lot more than before?

Those were the risks, of course. But he couldn’t help feeling sure that there would be far more advantages than disadvantages to having Lois in on the secret. No more lying, for a start. No more worrying that his very sharp-eyed partner would notice something and work it out. And she could help to cover for him too, he was sure.

Clark smiled broadly. He was happy with his decision. And so he started to spin.

********

What was he doing? He was spinning, whirling himself around right in front of her. But why? What on earth was he...?

And then she began to see traces of blue and red, and a tiny bit of yellow, in the whirling dervish which stood before her, and she caught her breath in shock.

<<Whirling dervish. *giggle*>>

Those colours - or the precise shade of those colours - were very familiar to her. And suddenly it all made sense.

Clark’s disappearances. His excuses and inability to explain himself. The anxious looks he got before running off. Just how he’d managed to do so many of the weird things he did - and how he always seemed to know when the bad guys were coming. Why he was never around, anyway, when danger struck.

And why Superman was never to be seen other than in an emergency situation, other than for a brief minute or two.

Two guises... one man.

<<Great line!>>

One Super man.

And now he was standing in front of her, arms folded across his chest in the familiar pose... but he was watching her with a strangely uncertain expression on his face. And she realised that he was anxious about what her reaction would be.

And... she didn’t know what her reaction was. She found suddenly that she had to slump back against the sofa cushions, because her muscles were refusing to hold her upright.

Superman was *Clark*? She’d worked beside Superman day after day for the best part of a year and she’d never known?

He’d never told her, never even given the slightest clue... and she’d been too busy looking at the externals to see what lay underneath. And in fact... hadn’t she actually said something of that kind to Clark when they’d first started working together? About looking beyond the external? Some judge she was!

And talking about things she’d said to Clark when they’d first met... she didn’t even want to go there. Embarrassed, she covered her face with her hands, unable to bear the thought of meeting the gaze of the man she’d insulted, sneered at and compared unfavourably to his alter ego - the alter ego who now stood in front of her.

“Lois?” He sounded puzzled, she thought, surprised. And even a little worried. Worried about *her*? “Lois, are you okay?”

She jerked her head up again and stared at him. And then spoke aloud the first thought which came into her head. “How do you do that spin thingy?”

<<LOL!!! Great reaction!!!>>

He blinked. “Well, it’s kind of a combination of Super-speed movement and using physics to keep everything up in the air until...” He trailed off, shaking his head. “You don’t really want to know about that... Lois, are you - ?”

But she didn’t want him to ask her any more questions. “Superman...” she started, more instinctively than anything else, then struggled to find words to explain what she was thinking, what she wanted him to explain.

But before she could say anything else, he interrupted her. “I’m Clark, Lois. I... uh, I suppose it’d be better if you called me Superman when I’m dressed like this, usually, but... it’s just me, you know.”

*Just* him? Lois found herself trying to stifle hysterical laughter. How could Superman be *just* anyone?

And how could Clark think that he was *just* anyone, when he could do so many wonderful things, save so many people’s lives? He was *Superman*! He was the most powerful being on Earth! And he was the person so many people looked up to.

He was also the person who’d worked with her for eight months, who’d put up with her terrible moods, who’d brought her coffee - and accepted her treating him like her personal slave, too! - and who’d been comforter, confidant and protector to her. Clark wasn’t a Super guy only when he was out saving the world.

<<*chokes on the “personal slave” line* J >>

“But you’re not, Clark!” she protested. “You’re not ‘just’ Clark - do you have any idea of how special you are?

“Me?” He looked taken aback, and she wondered if there was a flash of remembered hurt as well as disbelief in his expression. Of course, she had treated Clark as an irritant for quite some time, while all the time she’d been fawning over Superman - Clark in another guise. “I’m not that special. I have some powers, sure, but Clark Kent’s a pretty ordinary guy.”

“How can you say that?” Her shame about the way she’d treated him temporarily forgotten, Lois jumped to her feet and caught hold of his arm. “Clark, you are not ordinary in the slightest! You have no idea... over the last three days, I kept remembering so many special things you did for me, or ways you made my life nicer... ways you made things nicer for everyone. You’re the most special guy I know - and that was true even before I knew you were Superman.”

“Really?” He seemed very surprised at that, and she quickly nodded.

“Clark, I... I’m not sure I could ever put into words just how I felt when I thought that you’d been killed. And it wasn’t just when I found out, either - it was going on, day after day, and remembering - realising - just how important a part of my life you were. And knowing just how much you did for other people as well. There haven’t been a lot of smiles in the newsroom this week.”

<<Wow! I love her response! How special he is, not for being Superman, but for being himself. A really terrific turn for her to take in this situation.>>

Lois was watching him as she spoke, and she caught the quick blink and swallow which indicated that he was moved by her words. “I... I’m touched, Lois,” he said after several moments.

She shrugged. “I’m just telling it like it is.”

“Yeah.” He took a deep breath, then said, “Lois, you haven’t really said anything... about me being Superman, I mean.”

“Uh... no, I didn't,” she agreed. “It’s not... Clark, I mean, I’m not... I guess I’m just still stunned.”

“You’re not mad, are you?” he queried, sounding concerned.

Mad? Lois knew that she was struggling with several emotions, but she wasn’t sure that anger had been one of them. Okay, he’d never told her before tonight that he was Superman, but then she could just as easily retort by asking why he should have. This was clearly a very big secret; as a reporter, she could see only too easily the implications of people knowing Superman’s secret identity.

And, after all, she had by no means been the obvious person for him to tell, always assuming that he would have told anyone. She’d been dismissive of Clark while fawning over Superman. Why would he even consider telling her?

And yet he had told her tonight.

“No - no, I’m not mad,” she told him hastily. “I’m... well, kind of shocked, but I’ll get over that. But, Clark, I think tonight’s kind of put things into a different perspective. I mean, I know you being Superman is a huge deal, and any other time I’d be pretty excited about that, but it’s nothing like as important as you being alive. You... I really don’t care what other identities you have, as long as you’re here with me. If that makes any sense,” she finished awkwardly.

He nodded, a wondering smile creeping across his handsome features. “It makes a lot of sense, Lois. And... I’m very happy to be here with you.”

<<Yay!!! Okay, now they can get back to smoochies. Is this nfic? J >>

********

Clark opened his arms and tugged Lois against his chest, delighting again in the sensation of having her in his arms. In his Suit, there was less clothing to get in the way, and her slender body felt warm and delicious against his chest.

He’d hugged her many times before, but this was different. Very different. Now, it was obvious that Lois had deeper feelings for him than he’d ever imagined. The way she’d run to him, hugged him, kissed him when she’d found him on her doorstep had given him a pretty big clue, and her comments about how much she’d missed him made it evident. All the time he’d been standing in front of her as Superman, she’d been talking about what a major part of her life Clark was.

She might not love him, not the way he loved her... but he was special to her. And, for now, that was enough.

Unable to resist, he dropped a kiss on the top of her head, then released her and stood back to spin into his normal clothing, dusty as it was. He saw Lois blink at his repeated execution of the manoeuvre, but then she smiled at him, her tears gone. “Sit with me?” she asked him. “You don’t have to... well, go anywhere, do you?”

He shook his head. “No-one seems to want Superman at the moment.”

“I do,” she said instantly, but immediately looked embarrassed. “I mean... I don’t want you to leave. Clark. I don’t want *Clark* to leave.”

Was she worried that he might think she was only interested in him as Superman now? Of course, that had been one of his many reasons for not telling her the truth before. Strangely, now he felt that it wasn’t even an issue. But then, her rapturous greeting when he’d arrived, added to her heartfelt statement that having Clark safe and alive meant far more to her than the knowledge that he was Superman - and whatever that entailed for their friendship or any other kind of relationship which she might have wanted with Superman - told him that he had nothing to worry about.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he promised. “But...” He rubbed a hand across his chin and glanced down at his clothes. “I feel pretty scruffy. I should do something about it.”

Lois gripped his hand, shaking her head. “Not yet, please? I... I’m not sure that I want to let you out of my sight just yet.”

Her words sent a thrill of pleasure through him, but he protested, grinning at her. “I’m Superman, Lois. I could be back here, clean and presentable, in about two minutes, you know.”

“I don’t care,” was her instant response. Her smile died away, to be replaced by an expression of remembered sorrow. “I can’t help it, Clark - I’m afraid that if I let you out of my sight I’ll wake up and find that this is all a dream. That you’re still dead and I’m never going to see you again.”

Unable to say anything in response, he simply gathered her to him again, holding her tightly against him and stroking her hair in the only gesture of comfort he could make. “Lois,” he murmured to her. “I’m here. I’m safe. I swear to you,” he promised passionately, “I’ll never let you have to think that about me ever again.”

“You didn’t know what I thought, did you?” she asked him, her voice muffled because her head was pressed into the crook of his shoulder. “You were on the other side of the world - you didn’t even know what had happened until you came home, did you?”

“No,” he confirmed. “I suddenly found myself hovering over a wreck of rubble... I flew straight to Smallville to ask my parents what had happened. And then,” he added quietly, “I came straight here once they told me that you thought... I couldn’t let you grieve for me a second longer when I could do something about it.”

Lois drew back from him a little, still standing in the circle of his arms but now able to look up at him. “Why did you tell me the truth, Clark? You had the perfect cover story - you know I’d have believed it.”

“For a couple of reasons,” he admitted with a wry smile. “First, I... well, the way you looked when I got here. I had no idea that you’d be so upset to think that I was dead. So, given what you’d gone through over me, I couldn't bear to lie to you about this.”

He shook his head, then continued. “I was going to tell you the story I’d come up with. That’s why I’m like this,” he explained, gesturing at his appearance. “The stubble, looking dirty - I came back from Indonesia like that and I was going to shower and shave at my parents’ place. The ocean’s okay for getting rid of surface dirt, but it’s no substitute for a proper shower. Then when I knew I had to come to see you, I had the idea of telling you that Superman had taken me to Indonesia, and I thought I should look suitably dirty and untidy - that way I could say that he’d only just brought me back. I changed into these - ” he indicated the jeans and polo shirt with a wry grin - “and rolled in the dirt wearing them.”

“It was a good excuse, Clark. A lot better than some you’ve come up with!” Lois informed him, a glint in her eye. “I’m glad you told me. In fact, I’m... honoured, Clark. And... you know I’ll keep your secret, don’t you?”

<<LOL about the “a lot better than some you’ve come up with!” She’s finally remembering some of his lame excuses, isn’t she? J >>

He nodded. “I know you will. I trust you, Lois. And I’m glad you know. As we’ve got closer, become good friends, I’ve really hated lying to you.”

“You had to,” she said quickly. “I can understand that.”

Clark hugged her again for that, and she nestled against him once more as if she belonged there. He wished that she did - but then, this new deepening of their friendship seemed to suggest that they might be doing a lot of hugging in future.

But then she pulled back again and gave him a quizzical look. “You said there were a couple of reasons?” she questioned him.

There had been another reason, but he wasn’t sure that he was ready to tell Lois that he’d told her the truth because he loved her. She cared for him, he knew, but love was something different again. And he was well aware that she’d considered herself in love with Superman. Could he really bear to see her swear that she loved him in return, or that she thought she could fall in love with him, when it was only a short time since he’d heard her swear undying love and devotion to his alter ego?

But he’d also said that he didn’t want to lie to her any more...

Although perhaps there was a way out, he realised suddenly as he remembered a little piece of curiosity of his own.

“I’ll tell you the other reason if you tell me why you kissed me,” he told her with a quick grin. Despite the apparent lightness of his question, though, he was holding his breath.

<<Aww!!! Good idea, Clark! Gee, is this the same boy who had to pick up his cheese-of-the-month subscription or return a video?>>

Lois flushed and tried, for a moment, to bury her head against his shoulder again. But then she took a deep breath and pulled away from him.

“Clark, I meant it when I told you how much I’d missed you. How I discovered just how special you are to me. I... what I didn’t say is that even though when I was standing outside your apartment building watching it burn I finally admitted to myself how much I cared about you, even then I hadn’t a clue what you’d really meant to me. Every minute of every day since, Clark, there’s been something that reminded me of how much you do for me, how much I’ve come to depend on you, how important you’ve become to me... how much I need you.”

She turned away, but not before he’d seen tears glittering afresh on her lashes. Silently, he wrapped his arms around her, tugging her against him but letting her keep her back to him. He was stunned. Even with everything his parents had said, and all that he’d seen for himself since arriving at Lois’s apartment, he hadn’t begun to realise just how much she’d suffered from his apparent death. What could he say to Lois that would even begin to make up for her pain? He’d had no idea that he’d even come close to meaning that much to her.

“I... Clark, a week or so ago I told you that I love you... like a brother. I realised that I was wrong,” she whispered, so quietly that he had to use a little of his abilities to hear her. “I don’t... I could never love a brother the way I love you. I realised that I was in love with you, Clark - and you were dead and it was too late to tell you. I... I’d lost you for ever, and it was too late.”

Lois *loved* him? And not as a brother? She loved him the way he loved her? Barely able to process the knowledge, he simply held her more tightly and focused on the rest of what she’d said. Realising only after his apparent death that she loved him must have been awful. He couldn't begin to imagine how she must have felt.

She swallowed again, and a tear splashed onto Clark’s hand. Now he couldn't stay silent; as he bent his head to brush her cheek with his lips, he promised her, “It’s not too late, Lois. I’m here. You’ll never lose me, I swear it!”

She nodded. “I... I hope not, Clark. And,” she continued after another pause, “I bargained with myself in my dreams, I think. I swore that if I could only get another chance with you, I wouldn’t throw it away this time. I’d be honest with you about my feelings... I wouldn’t keep you at a distance, pretend that I felt nothing for you. I... I was scared, Clark. I’ve been hurt before...”

“I know,” he murmured. “Men who didn’t appreciate you, who thought they could treat you like dirt... I’ll never do that to you, Lois, I swear it.”

<<Gee, he’s swearing a lot today, isn’t he? J Maybe one could be “I promise” to cut down on repetition?>>

She twisted in his arms suddenly so that she was facing him, looking up at him from eyes that still shimmered with tears, although she was no longer crying. “When you came back, Clark... when I realised that you were alive after all - I kissed you because I love you.”

And, of course, that cynical side of him now had its proof. She had loved him as Clark before knowing that he was also Superman. But that didn’t matter to him at all. The only thing that mattered was that Lois loved him.

<<Cynical side of Clark? *gasps*>>

Though the thought of Superman did remind him of something...

“Lois,” he said softly, gazing down at her with, he was sure, all of his feelings for her reflected in his eyes. “You wanted to know the other reason why I told you the truth about where I was.”

“Yes?” she questioned, looking puzzled and even dismayed at his apparent change of topic.

“I told you who I am because I love you,” he told her emphatically. “Lois, I have loved you since the moment we met. Even if you didn’t love me back, I wanted to do something to show how much I love you. Lois, I love you.”

She was silent for a moment, the only sign of her reaction the fact that her eyes widened sharply. Then she gave a little cry of “Oh, Clark!” and she was straining up to kiss him again.

This time, he had no reason to hold back; sweeping her even closer to him, he returned her kisses with all the love and passion and yearning which he’d been hiding inside since he’d met this wonderful, special woman.

Where their relationship was going in the future, or even what was going to happen in the next hour, didn’t matter. The only thing of any importance was that he was in Lois’s arms and that they loved each other, and that kissing her was suddenly his favourite pastime. Even better than flying.

Or perhaps, he conceded some time later when he happened to notice something about their surroundings, even better *when* flying.

<<LOL!!! Great line to finish on!>>

~ Epilogue ~

“I thought I’d find you here.”

Trying not to let the concern she felt inside show in her expression, Lois came up to Clark and slipped her arm around his waist. He responded by wrapping his arm around her shoulders, tugging her even closer to him.

It was three weeks after the explosion, and although most of the time Clark appeared to be back to his normal cheerful self, he still had occasional spells when he would sink into gloom because of his regret over not being able to save his neighbours and friends. He was learning to deal with it; privately, Lois thought that, horrible as what had happened was, coping with the aftermath would help Clark in his Superman role. After all, if he allowed himself to become depressed when he failed to save people, he’d find it impossible to continue his hero role.

He’d been welcomed back to work with open arms - literally, in some cases. Perry, Jimmy and - somewhat to Lois’s chagrin - Cat had rushed to embrace him when he’d walked in with her the morning after his return. Perry had accepted the explanation for his absence with barely a grunt, brushing it aside with an injunction to write up his eye-witness account so it could be considered for publication. As Lois had suspected, people were too pleased to see Clark alive and well to pay too much attention to any gaps in his story.

<<I can just imagine Cat’s greeting. *grin* Wouldn’t be surprised to see Lois spitting nails. I wonder if Perry really believes the explanation? After all, we know by now that he can yodel. J >>

And Bill Henderson had cracked a rare smile when they’d called into the precinct. The police had already been informed that Clark was no longer a missing person, but when Lois had seen Henderson offer Clark his hand, she’d realised that the dour, cynical cop had actually needed to see her partner to believe in his survival. The little matter of Clark’s DNA had been resolved easily; Clark had pointed out to the detective that he saw no reason for his details to be kept on record in the circumstances, and Henderson had agreed to ensure that his wishes were carried out.

<<Good call! Although might have been more fun to see Lois and Henderson have a tug-of-war over the printout…*grin* You could add something here to give it a *little* bit more risk, like maybe having somebody notice something strange about the data before they get the message to through it out? *grin* Actually, would be really funny to end the story with Dr. Klein opening up the file on the DNA results and going, “That’s strange” and ending it there. Okay, just another one of my crazy ideas, sorry. J >>

She knew that Clark had been very gratified, as well as surprised, to see how pleased his colleagues and friends were that he was alive. It had astonished her to realise that he really had very little idea of how valued and liked he was. But then, that was her partner all over. He was friendly to people with no desire for anything in return; but in return he earned respect, liking and genuine affection.

And with her, of course, he’d found love. And not a day had gone past since his return that she didn’t count herself the luckiest person in the world. She’d got a second chance. She had Clark back; he loved her in return, and she had no intention of messing this one up. Clark was the most amazing guy she had ever met - not just because he was Superman, although she had to admit that his abilities made her jaw drop. No; because of all the special qualities which made him Clark. And, incredibly, he loved *her*. And, unbelievably, she loved him more with each passing day. She had no intention of ever letting him go, if she could help it.

The question of a place for Clark to live had been a little more difficult to resolve. Of course, as he’d said, he could easily commute from Smallville, but that wouldn’t do as an explanation for anyone else. He’d instead decided to take a room in a hotel, paid for by his insurance company, which had settled his claim for loss of property with impressive speed - and which had led to a very enjoyable shopping expedition for new clothes - while he looked for a new apartment.

<<Did Lois get to shop with him again? *evil grin*>>

Lois smiled as she remembered the conversation that had led to. They’d been in her apartment, sharing a delicious Mexican meal which Clark had flown in from Tijuana. They’d been surrounded by the details of several apartments which Clark was considering, and she’d suddenly had an idea. “Why don’t we get an apartment together?” she’d suggested.

He’d blinked, clearly taken aback by her proposition. “Lois... but I thought... I didn’t think you’d want to move in together. I mean, not this soon.”

Realising that he’d misunderstood her suggestion, she’d hastened to explain. “Not like that, Clark. I mean... yeah, I’d prefer to wait a while longer before we make love... uh, if you don’t mind, that is.” It wasn’t that she'd had - or still had - any doubts about her feelings for him, or his for her. It was just that, as much as she trusted Clark never to hurt her the way she’d been hurt in the past, she didn’t feel ready to take that step yet.

He’d quickly smiled in reassurance, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her in that slow, tantalising way he had sometimes, which drove her mad with wanting more. But he’d drawn back before she could deepen the kiss. “Sure. I’d prefer that too. I mean, we have as much time as we want. I want you to be sure about us, Lois. I mean, I love you and I know I want to be with you, but that doesn’t mean we have to make love yet. I *want* to - you have to know that I want to... but I want us both to be ready first. And I know I’m not.”

<<Hmm, it sounds just a bit odd to me. Could he maybe say that he’s not sure that he is? At least in my dialect that means that he knows he isn’t but doesn’t want to quite say it that harshly.>>

So unlike any other man she’d ever known... that had been further proof that her instincts were exactly right where Clark was concerned. He hadn’t said so, but she had a suspicion that he was thinking forever where their relationship was concerned. And, for the first time with a man, so was she.

<<Aww! Good for her! She wasn’t thinking that with Claude, though, before it went sour? I sort of thought that she was the type who would only let herself go if she thought the relationship had a future, and was just fooled by declarations of love.>>

“Me too,” she’d told him softly. “I mean... I love you more than I could ever imagine loving any man, and I know that I do want you that way... but I’m not ready. Living together like that isn’t what I meant. It’s just that... well, you’re my best friend as well as my boyfriend, and I love being with you, and I thought maybe... well, why don’t we find a bigger place, with two bedrooms, and share?”

<<This sounds so sweet! Do we get a sequel where we get to watch them try to share the bathroom, etc.? J >>

He’d looked very surprised at that, but she could see approval of the idea in his face. “But... well, I thought you were used to living on your own, Lois. You like your privacy.”

“I think I only ever said that to put guys off,” she’d said thoughtfully. “It does get lonely sometimes. But apart from that, if we’re going to stay together then chances are that at some point we’ll want to live together. Properly, I mean. As... lovers. So, since you’re looking for a new place now, why not look for one for the two of us?”

Clark had smiled warmly at that. “I love that idea, Lois. You can’t imagine how wonderful it sounds to me to think of sharing breakfast *and* supper with you every day, and for saying goodnight only to mean that you’re in the next room. I think it’s a great idea.”

And so she’d given notice on her apartment immediately, before they’d even found a place to move to, and then just the previous week they’d found the perfect apartment. It had two large bedrooms, a living-room twice the size of hers, a separate kitchen and a third, smaller bedroom which they could use as a study/office for the two of them. Even more perfect, one of the bedrooms had a balcony which was overhung by trees and from where Clark could depart and return as Superman completely unobserved. There was also a closet to which, he said, he could easily add a hidden compartment. The rent was quite a bit more than either of them had been paying separately, but between the two of them they could afford it easily. So, even though Lois’s own lease had a couple of weeks left to run, they’d moved in over the weekend, Clark’s Super abilities making quick and effortless work of the process.

<<Perfect!!! Definitely need a nice little waffy sequel set in the new apartment so we can enjoy reading about it! Can I borrow Clark when I move into my townhouse? I’m dreading the whole thing, mainly because of how my complex is designed…okay, I digress. *grin* I love picturing this apartment though!>>

So far, living with Clark had been even better than her imaginings. He cooked for her or fetched take-out from any corner of the world she wanted, and he could clean up in mere seconds. Having her own personal Superhero around was an added bonus; although most of the time Lois had never felt especially unsafe living alone - at least, as long as she had secure locks - now, she knew that her personal safety would never be an issue if Clark could help it.

And she was loving getting to know the real Clark; the man who was a combination of Super-powered hero and ordinary farmer’s son. Just as Superman wasn’t all that Clark was, the Clark Kent she’d known wasn’t all of him either. Seeing Clark walking across the ceiling to fit a replacement lightbulb was as much of a shock to her as seeing Superman making coffee.

<<Sounds fun! Extra space between “was loving?”>>

She knew that he loved being with her as well. They’d spent a couple of evenings working together in their study on current investigations, enjoying the intimacy of their own workspace. They could argue and banter and discuss their work together, unhindered by Planet colleagues. He still edited her copy, and she still argued that he should lose some of his softer edges. Clark could also use his abilities openly around the apartment, something she loved seeing him do.

And her presence gave him someone to talk to about his Superman exploits. He’d always had his parents, of course, but he’d told her a couple of times that it was by no means the same thing as being able to come home - or to Lois’s apartment - and be able to hold and be held by someone he loved while talking about some of the amazing - and at times soul-destroying - things he had to do as Superman. She’d wondered once before whether Superman ever needed someone to talk to and support him when he was down or upset after a rescue which had ended badly. Now she knew; he did. And now he had someone.

<<Soul-destroying, that’s a really poignant word (phrase?). By the way, you have an extra space between “and support.”>>

Best of all, they both loved the unlimited opportunities for kissing and hugging and cuddling that living together afforded them. Watching a movie with Clark had never felt better, although, strangely, Lois couldn’t remember actually seeing the ending of those they’d watched since Clark’s return.

<<LOL!!! They are *never* going to manage to actually see the entire movie of Lethal Weapon!>>

Kissing goodnight was fast becoming an exercise in learning to stop; neither of them wanted to end the kiss and move to their separate bedrooms, and the previous night Lois had fought very hard against the longing she’d felt to follow Clark to his bedroom and share his bed. Just to sleep; she knew that they both still felt that making love was a step they weren’t quite ready for, but she longed to sleep in Clark’s arms. That had its own risks, of course, and she didn’t think it was fair to Clark to put temptation in his path. Perhaps soon, though. She knew that she was finding it increasingly hard to find reasons to say that she wasn’t ready.

<<Move to nfic! Move to nfic!!! We need an nfic sequel. J >>

Life was very, very good indeed. Except that Clark was still coping with his sadness over the death of his friends.

Recalled to the present and his sadness as he stood beside her, she laid her head on his shoulder, making her sympathy plain and offering comfort by the gesture.

“I’m sorry; I should have figured you’d be wondering where I was,” he apologised softly.

Lois shook her head. “It’s okay, Clark. Just because we’re dating, it doesn’t mean that I have to know where you are every second of every day,” she teased him lightly.

“Naah. You just like to,” he teased back.

They stood in silence for several minutes, gazing at the boarded-up gap in the row of buildings, where 344 Clinton Street used to be. The site had been cleared and sold to a construction company which had permission to build an upmarket apartment block, part of a project to revitalise this area of town. The building work would be finished in another couple of months, and the first group of apartments had already been sold.

“I can’t help wondering what Mrs Tang would have made of all this,” Clark murmured after a while. “She wouldn’t have lived in a modern apartment building, that’s for sure.”

“I guess not,” Lois said, unsure of how to respond. She’d never really met Clark’s former neighbours, but she knew only too well how upset he still was at their deaths. “Sometimes, modernisation isn’t such a good thing.”

“No,” Clark agreed quietly. “This is going to be one of those places where tenants vote on who gets to buy or rent vacant units - I can’t see Mr Ramirez being considered ‘acceptable’ to anyone. How many people these days want to live next to an old guy who’s almost deaf and who keeps his radio on full blast all day?”

“They’re changing the demographics of the neighbourhood,” Lois commented wryly. “Old people, kids, animals just aren’t going to be welcome any more.”

“No, they’re not,” Clark answered bitterly. “I should have saved them, you know.”

“Clark, we’ve been over this! How could you have? You were in Indonesia - and you know you agreed that it was more important to be there!”

“I could have prevented it happening,” he said sadly. “I read the report - you know that it said the leak was in my apartment!”

“That doesn’t make it your fault!” she protested instantly.

“I know. But, Lois, I’m Superman! You know that my senses are far stronger than other people’s. If I’d been home any time in the twenty-four hours before the explosion, I’d have smelt the gas. And I could have done something about it. The explosion need never have happened.”

If he’d been home... But he had been, hadn’t he? “Didn’t you go home after you walked me back to my place that night?”

He shook his head. “I went out on patrol - there were a couple of break-ins and an accident that kept me busy for a while. And then I was flying back home and heard the news report about the earthquake. I went straight to Indonesia. If I’d gone home first...” He sighed heavily, looking down at the ground.

Or, Lois thought, if he’d gone home the night before instead of keeping watch outside her apartment...

<<Ouch! Oh, no! Lois!>>

She hugged him tighter. “Clark, there’s nothing to be gained from what ifs, we both know that. If I hadn’t been so stupid and let myself become a target for Sebastian Finn...”

“That wasn’t your fault,” he insisted automatically. Then, sighing again, he added, “I guess you’re right. I just wish...”

“I know.” Lois reached up and kissed him lovingly, willing him to accept her comfort; after a moment, he responded with a brief, forceful kiss which left her breathless.

“I love you,” he said, his voice rough with emotion.

“I love you too, Clark. Come on, let’s go home.”

Together, hand in hand, they walked to the Jeep, their backs to a past neither of them would ever forget. It had shaped what they were now, individually and to each other - but it had also given them their future together. Lois knew that one day, for Clark, grief would fade; while he would never forget, he would stop blaming himself. She, and Martha and Jonathan, were determined on that.

They loved each other. And, while Lois couldn’t quite believe that love could conquer all, it could make a darned good try.

<<Wow, fantastic final line!!! Funny, but so true as well!! And I really like how you’ve given us updates on so many different aspects of what is going to happen next. Makes us feel like we can really picture their lives now.>>

~ The End ~

<<I really liked the conversation between Lois and Clark, I think you’re being too hard on yourself again. J The finish was very cool, especially Lois and Clark getting an apartment together, which was really sweet. I love it!>>